Nawwww, this has little to do with fantasy.  And maybe I shouldn't even share it; it could be interpreted as super critical.  But you know, I've been sick for 10 days so maybe I'm not thinking real good.  So what the heck.  On Memorial Day I trekked up to Seattle to catch the M's and the Orioles.  I was a little surprised by the stadium…I had heard so much GOOD about it.  So here goes….

1)  You have to pass Renton.  O.k., this ones personal.  The girl I dated in college, who I thought I would marry, yes, she grew up in Renton.

2)  Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.  We sat in the 3rd level above 3rd base.  As such, you can look outside the stadium and see…..the freeway.  Or you could look up and see…the path of planes heading to SeaTac.  Or you could just listen for it…and hear the annoying sound of trains passing by the right field wall.  These same seats at AT&T Park in San Francisco…and I see the Bay, and the Bay Bridge.  You'd think someone would of thought to swing the thing around and take advantage of downtown Seattle, the Space Needle, and the Sound.  Yuck.

3)  It's Memorial Day.  It's Major League Baseball.  It's your incredible ballpark.  And it's only half full for a team contending in the AL West.  Sad.

4)  It's Memorial Day.  I couldn't wait for the 7th inning.  Now the Mariners did a good job honoring vets during the course of the day, so M's management gets a lot of credit.  But the fans….  So sad.  They sang "Take me out to the Ballgame" louder than "God Bless America."  A LOT louder.

5)  The concessions.  When you stand in line for 15 minutes, and you hand over nearly $7 for a hot dog, you expect to be able to smother it with relish, kraut, even something as simple as mustard.  But not in Seattle.  They had run out of all that stuff.  Very, very unprofessional.

6)  The parking garage.  It was great that it was close to stadium and had fast access to the freeway.  Kudo's to the designers.  But ya think ya could put signs up, you know, saying what level you are on?  It had 6 levels, and people were going all the way to the top, only to head right back down the crowded stairwell to try to find their correct level.  How could you tell?  You had to walk in and read the elevator numbers.  Geessshhhhh.

7)  The fans started doing the "rally clap."  What's wrong with that?  Well, you don't do it when the visiting team is trying to score.  Duuhhhhhhhh.

8)  The lack of talent on the field.  OK, that's not a stadium thing, other than the players play in the stadium.  But the M's and the Orioles?  YAWN.

9)  It's Seattle, right?  Known for Starbucks, right?  Uhhh, never saw a Starbucks stand in the stadium.  Come on Seattle, if Colorado can serve 'Rocky Mountain Oysters', surely you can get what your city is renowned for inside that stadium of yours!

10) It's the American League.  Which means American league rules.  Which means it's not TRUE baseball.  I mean, you take away all the strategy of what to do with the pitcher coming up so I can watch the .210 hitting Jack Cust come to the plate.  Please, get me to a TV with a National League game on it NOW!

HONORABLE MENTION:

11)  The fans (that were there), did the wave.

12)  This one kind of sums it all up:  There just is no charm in that place.  It's nice, but what exactly is there?  No view of the Bay.  No Cable Car in right field.  No Coke Bottle slide for the kids.  No minature stadium for the kids to play wiffle ball in.  No Willie Mays glove in right.  No 'splash hits' count.  No free standing room area in right field to watch the game.  No McCovey Cove.  I know I am a San Fran homer here, but at least they built a stadium with LOTS of charm.  And I kind of expected that when I went up.

So, next year, meet me in the City by the Bay for a game!